Why Grief Comes in Cycles

Grief rarely moves in a straight line. It arrives in cycles that rise and fall in their own rhythm. You might feel steady for days and then suddenly find yourself pulled back into emotion. Nothing dramatic has changed, yet something inside you stirs, and the wave returns.

These cycles can feel confusing at first. You may wonder why you’re feeling things again that you thought you had already worked through. But grief doesn’t follow a timeline. It follows readiness. Each cycle brings you into contact with a different layer of your experience.

Some cycles are gentle, like a tide coming in.

Others feel sharp, as if the emotion has returned with full force.

Most are somewhere in between.

Grief cycles often reflect the body processing emotion at a pace you can handle. When your system has enough capacity, a new layer emerges. When life becomes too demanding, the cycle pauses. When safety increases, another wave rises.

You may notice cycles around:

• significant dates

• small memories

• changes in routine

• moments of unexpected quiet

• periods of stress

• times when support becomes more available

Cycles don’t mean you’re going backwards. They show that your system is still moving. Each time a wave returns, you meet it with slightly more resilience, slightly more understanding, slightly more breath. This is how integration happens.

Grief cycles often soften over time. The intensity may decrease. The duration may shorten. The emotion may feel more spacious. But this softening does not erase the meaning of what you’ve lived through. It simply reflects how your inner world is adjusting.

There may be cycles that feel heavier than expected. These often arise when a deeper layer becomes ready to move. It can be unsettling, but it also signals progress. You’re touching parts of yourself that were not accessible before.

When you understand grief as cyclical, you stop expecting the process to resolve all at once. You start giving yourself room to feel what rises, without judging its timing. Cycles are the body’s way of honouring what mattered.

If you know someone who may benefit from breathwork for grief, or if you’d like support moving through these emotional cycles with steadiness, you’re welcome to explore my grief-tending breathwork sessions. They offer a grounded space for each wave to move safely.

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